The Bald And The Beautiful

taken from tumblr

As women we are all, in some way, conditioned from a young age to believe that our hair is a part of what makes us so beautiful. That it is one of the biggest determiners of our beauty. We decorate it with pretty ribbons or spend hours in salon chairs while hair dressers tug and pull at us, all in the name of beauty. Now trust me I know there is no better feeling than looking in the mirror and seeing a freshly braided head or feeling the wind as it moves through your blown out hair, there really is nothing like it. Your hair is your crown so we are told, hence why we put so much work into making sure it always looks its best.

But what happens on the days when our hair just isn't agreeing with us ? We've all had them , 'bad hair days', when our hair just doesn't want to make nice with our combs and gels and sprays. So what happens on those days? Does that mean that we are automatically deemed less pretty, because the blow out just isn't flowing quite right in the wind or because our braids are not as fresh as they used to be ? Does this prove the point that many of us base our beauty on what is seen on our exterior as opposed to what is on the inside. Okay so of course I always try to look my absolute best where ever I go, whether it may be the mall , campus or even the vending machine downstairs, I always want to make sure my hair looks good because when I look good I feel good, but my question is, By who's standards do you define your beauty on?

At the beginning of the year I took a trip to the hair salon to get my hair permed and dyed a light brown. I was going into my first year of varsity and I wanted a fresh new look. I had the freedom to do what I wanted with my hair because I didn't have the constraints of high school rules telling me what I can and cannot do with my hair. But three and a half hours later (after the hair dresser messed up my hair) I walked out with orange hair and I was anything far from happy. I could never step foot onto campus as a first year with orange hair I told my family. So a few days before classes started I woke my brother up at seven O'clock in the morning gave him my dads machine and asked him to cut my hair off. To be honest , cutting my hair wasn't that big of a deal because I had been planning on doing it either way maybe just not that soon or so abruptly, but I did it and there I was with a buzz cut for the first time since grade five and I can honestly say that I had never felt more free. Not only was I going to save a ton of money and time, on trips to the hair salon, But I got to see a side of myself that I had never seen before.

Years ago I heard a song by India Arie titled "I Am Not My Hair", and sang along to it not thinking of the impact of the words :

But years later having found myself wit nearly bald head I realised the importance of those lyrics. Yes its hard to not want to live up to worldly expectations of ridiculous beauty standards because in all honesty all we want is to fit in and be admired, but is it worth it if it is at the cost of your authenticity? I realised that the beauty I was so often praised for was, yes because of my physical beauty (thank you mom and dad) but at some point all of that fades away. There will come a time when our bodies are not as "snatched" as they once were, when our skin won't be as clear and when our hair won't be as full as it once was and when that day comes all that will be left of your beauty is what is on the inside. Even now you can be the most physically appealing woman in the room but if you're vibrating negative and unpleasant energy then that will be what others not only feel but see too. Our beauty is formed within us. It is not in the temporary things like our hair or waist sizes. So if you ever feel like you just want to chop all your hair off but you're too scared that you won't fit societies version of beauty , just think f*ck it and go ahead because Bald is beautiful too.